allergies, galleries and the church lady

allergies are of the devil. that's right, and if you unscramble the letters, it actually says galleries-which are a tool of satan as well, because galleries have naked people and naked statues and we all know that being naked is.. a sin... and just like allergies make me look bad, being naked makes me look worse, and looking bad must be a sin because 'ugly' comes from satan too...ugliness is skin deep (just like beauty) and hmm...flesh, satan, sin...and that's my confusing version of the church lady from snl, only...i wasn't given a prompt as easy as SANTA. it was a little harder to manipulate allergies.

all of that to say: i hate pollen.

today my head felt like a watermelon might feel if it had peanut butter inside it instead of the delicious red pulpy stuff.(why a watermelon? i don't really know). i  left my nose spray that would clear it up at home and all day long, all i wanted to do was get two of those vicks sticks and just stick them in my nostrils and walk around with them vaporizing my nose (not vaporizing like a laser beam from star trek just vaporizing a clear pathway). the visual would be slightly disturbing.

on my way home from walmart this afternoon, i saw the sign for edible arrangements . how beautiful are those baskets?! we got those for our principal one year for boss' day...how expensive are they!!! well, on the way home my thoughts took many twists, and one of those was...i could start a line for them with dehydrated fruit:

that's honeydew and strawberry with fruit roll-up around the base.

and a few extra berries and melon to fill in the empty space

just kidding.
pretty sure i just heard a collective sigh of relief from around the globe...and sorry gigi, i'm not bringing it to school tomorrow, i just ate it.(did that sound like i fell and scraped up my face? because i didn't, and i don't want anyone to worry, i literally ate the arrangement.)

i took the apple head man to school today and showed it to the kids, and one brilliant boy asked in all seriousness if i was going to eat it.

yes. i always dry my apples in the open air and put plastic eyes on them and make bodies for them before i eat them. it makes me feel more powerful.

did i mention that last night after i told those guys to chill out, i double checked my locks, and then locked my room door and kept thinking crazy thoughts about them coming back to the complex and burning it down or something? too much criminal minds marathon i guess...

alright, gotta get the dogs out while it's still light out!
julie